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Garruk's Grinning Anvil & Oddities

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Est. 2025 • Half-orc Artificer (Battle Smith)

Garruk's Grinning Anvil & Oddities

Garruk hums carnival tunes while he works and insists every weapon has a 'personality' that he must interview before sale. He occasionally offers a 3-for-2 deal...

GA

Shopkeeper

Garruk Tallowfist, a Half-orc Artificer (Battle Smith) (Lvl 7)

Keeper's Species

Half-orc

4 Weapons2 Armor2 Misc2 Potions1 Misc2 Misc1 Misc1 Misc1 MiscEst. 11.4k gp

Shop Inventory

(16)
Weapons4

A wickedly curved longsword whose fuller has been filed into a grin. Tempered in tallow and bat-ink, it hums when mischief is afoot.

Atk On a critical hit, the target must succeed on a Wisdom save or laugh uncontrollably (incapacitated, no bonus action) for 1 round. Once per day the wielder can cause the blade to emit a mocking chuckle, granting advantage on Intimidation for 1 minute.

A finely balanced hand crossbow with a small, hollow ceramic clown-head sight that squeaks when cocked.

Ammunition fired from this crossbow makes a faint squeak on impact (harmless). Once per short rest, the wielder can fire a 'Titter Bolt' that deals an extra psychic damage and forces a Wisdom save or be affected as by Tasha's hideous laughter for 1 round.

A two-handed greataxe with a socket inset in the haft, currently holding a dull green pestle-shaped charm that seems to blink.

Atk Counts as a +2 greataxe. The charm can be swapped with other small oddities (see 'oddities' note) to grant different minor effects. Current charm grants once-per-day 'SlamEcho'—on hit, the target takes extra thunder damage and must succeed on Constitution save or have ears ring (disadvantage on Perception checks relying on hearing) for 1 minute.

A balanced hand-hammer with a chipped stone head carved into a frowning face. Pleasant to throw and very loud on impact.

On hit, the hammer emits a concussive bark that can awaken sleeping creatures within 5 feet (no save). Once per short rest the thrower can teleport the hammer back to their hand as a bonus action.
Armor2

A dark-grey chainmail that seems to shift and whisper; small dents look like tiny faces.

AC +16Once per long rest, the wearer can invoke the 'Grudge' ward: suffer no more than half the damage from one attack (reaction). The armor murmurs petty insults at attackers, imposing disadvantage on stealth rolls in heavy shadow.

A heavy steel shield with soot smears that never fully rub off and a cartoonish soot-stain in the shape of a smiling skull.

AC +2Provides +2 to AC (applies as a shield). Once per long rest, the bearer can slam the shield into the ground to release a plume of choking soot: creatures in a 10-foot cone must make a Constitution save or be blinded until the end of their next turn.
Miscellaneous2

A grubby rag soaked in oddly fragrant grease. Garruk promises it never fails to make someone stumble—for a price.

When thrown at a 5-foot square, the area becomes difficult terrain and any creature entering the square must succeed on a Dexterity save or fall prone. Lasts 10 minutes or until scraped clean.

A necklace made from a ring of tiny bent nails. Don't ask how they got polished.

When worn, grants the wearer advantage on checks to break bindings or pry things open. Once per day the necklace sheds tiny, harmless sparks that can be used to light tinder.
Potions2

A tin of thick, warm salve that smells faintly of iron and cinnamon. Quickly soothes cuts and blisters.

Heal 2 HPFunctions as a standard Potion of Healing ( HP). Garruk claims it 'removes the sting of failing at terrible decisions.'

A thick vial of copper-colored tonic. It looks suspiciously like it was brewed from leftover ale and solder scraps.

Heal 4 HPFunctions as a Potion of Greater Healing ( HP). Garruk warns: drink too fast and you'll hiccup sparks.
Miscellaneous1

A palm-sized clockwork skull with expressive metal jaw and one glass eye. It gallivants about on tiny spring legs and grins incessantly.

AC +12Functions like a homunculus familiar but with a comedic personality: when the familiar uses the Help action it can produce an unsettling giggle to distract foes, granting disadvantage on saves vs being frightened by the wielder once per short rest.
Miscellaneous2

A heavy pair of iron tongs that clamp with unnatural firmness. Favored by smiths and bar bouncers alike.

Grants advantage on checks to hold or resist being disarmed. Once per day can clamp an unattended object (up to 5 lbs) for up to 1 hour; the clamp can't be opened except by the owner or with a Strength check.

A leather bellows with stitched cartoon flames. Inflates a large fire fast, with a faint smell of burnt croissant.

When used on a forge or campfire, the fire reaches optimal temperature in 1 minute instead of 10. Once per day it can create an extra burst of heat that scorches a 5-foot area ( fire) for dramatic effect.
Miscellaneous1

A bottle of oily, reddish liquid. Sprinkled on metal, it whispers promises to dissolve rust—or secrets.

Apply to a mundane weapon or armor to remove rust and grant a bonus to attack or AC for 1 hour. If used on magical items, there's a 10% chance it temporarily suppresses one non-weapon magical property for 10 minutes.
Miscellaneous1

A boxed set with small hammer, nail kit, whetstone, iron filings, and two candles. Useful for field repairs.

Grants advantage on simple smithing checks for field repairs; includes 3 uses of adhesive material (repairs that last 24 hours).
Miscellaneous1

A sealed glass jar containing a slow, rolling giggle that sounds oddly like a tavern minstrel.

Break the jar to release laughter in a 15-foot radius; affected creatures must make a Wisdom save or be incapacitated with laughter for rounds. Creatures immune to being charmed are unaffected.
GA

Garruk Tallowfist

Half-orc•Artificer (Battle Smith)•Lvl 7

Shop Atmosphere

“Garruk hums carnival tunes while he works and insists every weapon has a 'personality' that he must interview before sale. He occasionally offers a 3-for-2 deal: buy two mundane repairs and get one odd trinket free (customer must take a blind pick from the oddities cabinet). When asked for discounts, he offers 'payment in embarrassing secrets' as a joke—if a PC volunteers an actual secret, Garruk will dramatically pretend to record it in a soot-stained ledger, then produce a 5% discount and a consolatory cookie.”
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