Cheeseburger is a small, round-faced halfling man with warm brown skin, unruly black curls, and an expression of permanent, mild surprise. He wears an oversized scholar's robe beneath a patched acolyte's sash, with tiny brass bells sewn into the hem. Within a minute of meeting him, people notice that he rarely walks in a straight line. He zigzags around furniture, favors his left side, and constantly glances toward ceilings, exits, and unattended food. His spellbook is bound in red leather and covered in handwritten prayers, corrections, and increasingly sarcastic notes about his former cult.

Cheeseburger is sunny, distractible, and sincerely kind, with the anxious energy of someone who has escaped one conspiracy but suspects there are several more nearby. He treats magical theory like sacred study and sacred study like a group project that desperately needs better notes. He is quick to offer help, quick to apologize, and almost impossible to intimidate once someone else is in danger.

Cheeseburger was raised in the Lantern Beneath the Hill, a cheerful-looking religious community that taught its members to praise the Hidden Feast, share everything, and never ask what happened to the people selected for the Midnight Offering. Cheeseburger was an enthusiastic acolyte, mostly because the cult's ceremonies involved excellent bread, dramatic chanting, and a very impressive rotating altar. He learned prayers, copied holy texts, and became oddly good at noticing when sacred symbols had been altered to conceal arcane formulae. His faith collapsed during his first attempted sacrifice. The cult leader, Mother Gristle, declared that Cheeseburger had been chosen to carry divine favor into the next world. Cheeseburger accepted this with surprising enthusiasm until he noticed that everyone else was standing safely behind a locked gate. He escaped by combining a badly remembered blessing with a correctly remembered spell, then spent several months hiding in libraries and legitimate temples. Now he travels as a wizard and reluctant former acolyte, trying to build a life that is not organized around somebody else's prophecy. He still prays, but mostly to ask the gods whether a suspiciously enthusiastic sermon is going to end in murder.